Trying to live life with sandy toes and laughter
Step One – Self Forgiveness and Acceptance.
Release the heaviness of taking responsibility. Let it be ok not to be perfect. What does that mean? Try not to beat yourself up for the choices you have made. Your life is full of choices, big and small, and when we establish a habit of being hard on ourselves for being less than perfect, it’s natural that our mind creates ‘stories’ to interpret our lives in a way that deflects responsibility to avoid the pain. Leading to never seeing ourselves clearly, and potentially creating a wall that stops the path to growth. Make it ok to be imperfect.
Step Two – Awareness and Awakening.
Once you have a lightness to the idea of being ‘wrong’, you can clearly see your role in disappointments and see them as a chance to grow rather than a burden of heaviness to be avoided. From romantic relationships to friends and family and work relationships, our lives are filled with triggers and challenges that can be used to help see yourself and patterns. See and accept your role in the past but know you have the power to create a different future. One that aligns with what you want and who you want to be.
Step Three – Attempt Conscious Change, be ok with failing.
You are ok with not being perfect. You are aware of and take responsibility for the choices that keep you in the same patterns. But how do you grow from this? Shouldn’t this be enough to change magically? Most patterns are so automatic that we are not aware we have made a choice at all. Sometimes we are aware, but well after the fact. But the brain can change. The automatic path in the brain will be the most used one. We need to stop the auto response in favour of a conscious one. Start by attempting consciousness in the present moment. Notice how you feel and why you feel a certain way. In time, you will arrive at a place of awareness before the automatic reaction kicks in. Once you are there, try consciously reacting by choosing a different path. One that aligns with how you like to see yourself and the outcome you desire. Sometimes it will work. Sometimes you will follow the old path. When you do, go back to step one and be forgiving. Eventually, it will work more and more.
Three easy steps right 😉
I was inspired to write these steps based on my struggles with patterns attracting the same outcomes as well as experiences working to help others overcome blocks. I was stuck in step two for a long time but more recently have found my way in and out of step three. It’s a journey.